file Today's humor

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WayneWilmeth Posted 8 years 7 months ago
#12902
What???? Bro Anthem??????
I just can't stay logged on this forum very long any more.
God bless the child that's got his own.
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anthem Posted 8 years 7 months ago
#12910
Wayne you're a day late and a Thai Baht short...I was referring to your Kansas humor post. :lol:
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Every great performance deserves an Audience!
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WayneWilmeth Posted 8 years 7 months ago
#12919
^^^^^^ The Story of my life!!!!!
God bless the child that's got his own.
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anthem Posted 8 years 7 months ago
#13036
Uncanny...
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Every great performance deserves an Audience!
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WayneWilmeth Posted 8 years 7 months ago
#13182
A man with no arms is homeless and looking for a job.

He goes to the pastor in his local church one morning and says: “Pastor, I am in desperate need of work. Is there any kind of job you can give me, despite my obvious disability?”

The pastor, with a cheeky grin, points to the churches bell tower and says: “You see that bell up in the tower? If you can ring that for me every day precisely at noon, I will pay you $20 a day. Can you do that for me?”

The no armed man hesitates, but the offer of $20 a day sounds too promising, so he agrees.

Later that day, he makes his way up to the bell tower but alas, cannot pull the rope for obvious reasons. However, he does not give up. Being a quick thinker, the man takes a stance in front of the bell, and begins repeatedly bashing his face into the bell. Success! the bell rings on the strike of noon, and a slightly dizzy no armed man returns downstairs, where a very confused pastor lives up to his promise and grants him $20.

This process continues for several weeks. Every day at noon, the man would head to the bell tower and bash his face into the solid metal for it to chime, and then the pastor would pay him. Over time, however, this method began damaging the mans head, both inside and out. Bruises were always constant, and the pastor began noticing the man would slur his speech, look deranged and have trouble walking in a straight line. But there were no complaints, and the man, though a bit slower by the day, was still getting paid happily, so it continued.

On one fateful day, however, the man once again staggers up the stairs to reach the bell tower as noon approached. He took his normal stance, ready to smash his head once again into the giant chiming machine. However, on this fateful day, he succumbs to the damage, and as he charges at the bell, he staggers so much that he completely misses the target. His momentum takes him right over the shallow wall of the tower and he plummets to the ground. He is killed instantly.

A crowd of people begin to gather around the no armed man’s body, including a police officer.

A woman looks at the body, horrified, and asks “Oh my god, does anybody know who this man is?”

The police officer looks at the dead man and replies “I don’t know him, but his face rings a bell.”

God bless,
Wayne
God bless the child that's got his own.
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anthem Posted 8 years 7 months ago
#13197
;) Panthers ;)
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